1 Corinthians 6:12 says- "Everything is permissible for me- but not everything is beneficial."
I figured this possible new assignment fell in to that category.
It has been a month or so since she first asked me and thankfully, she has not been bugging me for an answer. I think I've been given permission from the Lord to do this, but now I have to ask for permission from my husband. I know, I know. There are many reading this thinking..."What? If God has given you permission then so has your husband." That is not necessarily true.
1 Corinthians 11:3 says: "But I want you to understand that Christ is the head of every man, and man is the head of a woman, and God is the head of Christ."
We spend a good deal of our time at the church as it is and have a ton of responsibilities already. I need to yield to my husband's desire, so that our family unit can be protected. There was a time in my married life that this would not have been the case. I would have told him what I was doing and waited for him to get over being upset about it. I've changed. The Lord has changed me. Now, I understand that my husband was put over me to protect me, not to "control" me. There is a line there and many don't see it. Just because I yield to his wishes doesn't make me less of a partner in our marriage. He will listen to what I have to say on the matter and will consider it as he makes the final decision. It all boils down to trust. Do I trust my husband's relationship with the Lord? Do I trust the Lord to show him the same as me? Control isn't the issue, trust is. (But, that is a whole 'nother ball game in and of itself.)
Which leads me to my dilemma...my dilemma isn't whether my hubby is going to allow me to do this, it is- what to study when, and if, my hubby does give the thumbs up. You know I am not a worry wart like some. I have totally given this to the Lord and trust that He will direct my path. I trust that my husband listens to the Lord, and if the Lord has truly spoken to me, then I rest in the knowledge that the Lord will speak to my husband as well. So, that's where I am now- I'm in that resting place.
While I rest, I might as well get some ideas in my mind about what the Lord would want us to study. Actually, my question to the Lord has been, what do you want me to study? I found a book at the local Christan bookstore that looks interesting - "Having a Mary Heart in a Martha World" by Joanna Weaver. I struggle in this area. I want to be Mary. I want to be sitting at the feet of Jesus all day. I could study and read all day. I could sit and enjoy the presence of the Lord all day long. But, being the Martha person that I am, where everything has a place and organization needs to conquer the chaos, we all know that can't happen. Or can it? Between the many loads of laundry, bandaging all the boo-boos, between the refereeing and hugs, Jesus is still there and I can meet him. I've just begun this book and already I wake-up each morning waiting to read a little bit more about how I can be both Mary and Martha.
Balance...that's what we all need. A balance of both Mary and Martha.
On that note, I need to put my Bible and books away
and ever-so slowly move toward the laundry-
at least for a little while.
2 comments:
Were you listening to part of my conversation with Jen last night. I was telling her my experiences with Eharmony. I had one guy that I had only exchanged one email with and in his second email, he was already informing that he would be head of the house and make all the decisions. It struck me wrong. Not that I do not believe the scripture, I do 100%. The problem I had was him feeling the need to inform me of that so early in our communication. It astounded me and I knew he had issues with this. When I read you were going to ask David , my thoughts were that you should as his companion. Any new responsibility affects both of you.
I pray that if the both of you decide this is what you should do that it would become an awesome ministry for you.
This is a great post. First off....you and I are so much alike when it comes to submission. I have some "well-meaning" friends who criticize me for getting permission from my hubby. I totally agree with you. God has it set up in a way that our hubbies (if Godly) have our best interests at heart.
I have done a book study on "A Woman After God's Own Heart" by Elizabeth George. It has a workbook, if I remember correctly. But, the sound of your idea, too, is interesting. I might have to check into it.
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